Alright, challenge accepted.
The milkoracle proposed that 20 minutes or 4 and a half hours of writing the CommonApp US Essay would yield the same result, so here goes nothing!
---
I remembered a poignant conversation with my friend: "If you can start from above, why do you insist on starting below and working your way up? You'll die of exhaustion!"
We were talking about relationships, but his question really extended to other areas of my life. I come from a comfortable middle-class family in Indonesia and life has always been easy, but mediocre for me. I had little aptitude in the arts and sports, and an unfit physique. Only two features redeemed me: my slightly above intelligence, and my attitude. I don't mean to brag, but my life could have been considerably easier. I mean, I could always stay put and perform regularly in my studies, and lead a comfortable life in Indonesia, my beloved country.
Yet, my life has always been full of leaps. I moved to a much more competitive secondary school in Tangerang, Indonesia, and from there, leaped to out-of-the-world St Joseph's Institution in Singapore. Seemingly unsatisfied, with a lot of luck, I joined the famous Bishan JC, apparently one of the top premier education in Singapore. And when I thought life couldn't get even harder, here I am, seeking to apply to even greater heights of Cambridge and Princeton.
If I am a fish, I was born very small, and was constantly thrown into bigger and bigger ponds before I can even grow to my fullest potentials. It was really just nice, any slower growth and I would have been swallowed by the Piranha of the pond --- stress and fear. Of course, I managed it with the help of the people around me, they make me believe that guardian angels exist. I remember how at one instance, I was lonely and stressed, and my ex-teacher gave me a Facebook message just on time to tell me that everything was going to be alright. At another instance, I was at the end of the rope when a particular girl threw one anew at me. It may sound naive and puerile, but back then she was the driving force that woke me up from my bed in my early mornings.
But of course, the second redeeming feature of myself played a significant part too. I used to get carried away feeling very inferior; After all, I believed that I got where I am now due to the fact that I had potential --- It remains to be seen if it will ever be realized. However, whenever I am in despair, I stop, turn inwards, and look back. I do realize, despite leaving lots of shattered glasses and leakages of water behind in my imperfect trail, it has been a wonderful journey after all. I remember telling a stranger at a perfume shop: "a black sheep makes the white sheep whiter." Without these challenges, I would never realize my life and my true potential. Although time had barely allowed me to breathe and expand my wings, this is the path I took, and I never regretted it, thank you!
So life, please carry on, take me to greater heights, and bless me with these greater challenges.
It was meant to be.
So to be honest, I have Singaporean friends asking me; I have ladies asking me about where I would live in after I finish studying. What my reply was, and will always be: "Singapore is a really nice place to stay. You are taken care of, everything is stable, and wonderful." However, it is only right to repay one's debts, and to help one's country in whatever possible way you can, thus I am going back to Indonesia one day to live there again, hopefully growing together with her. Why? The choice seems foolish: It is a lot riskier, and is truly much more difficult. Then the voice inside my head asks: "why not?"
After all, working my way upwards has always been my specialty.
---
Okay, I have a few confessions to make. This definitely took more than twenty minutes, perhaps almost twice of it including the brainstorming and the grammar checks. Moreover, it definitely exceeds five hundred words, perhaps amassing about 700 to 800 words? And I am simply too sleepy to condense it. Nevermind, hopefully it paints a better picture of myself nevertheless. Thanks for reading :)
Orh, if any Singaporean teachers are reading this blog, happy Teachers' day :) In Indonesia, we refer to teachers as "Pahlawan tanpa tanda jasa" which literally translates to "heroes without insignia". It may be tough to be the sole candle amid the oppressing enigma of darkness, but please carry on, for someday the room will be brightly lit.
Truly Indonesia's Finest
Wednesday, 29 August 2012
Friday, 24 August 2012
Day 38 - Last Night Out
Hi there :)
Today is my last official day of school. Though there'll be more significant milestones, like the Farewell Assembly or the end of As, today marks the beginning of the finale throughout my four years sojourn in Singapore. Definitely not without challenges, my journey was. Now, I shall resist the temptation to speak like an old man and not write my year end reflections yet! There'll be one post constituting such overarching summation of my experiences here, but let's save that for later :)
Anyway, I decided to be an antisocial hermit who needed some time by himself, barring all contact and accessibility by deliberately leaving my mobile phone behind. It was a really fun outing, truly :) I opted for a steak dinner at Astons (but had a pork chop, as usual) and while waiting around twenty minutes for my order to be grilled to perfection, I thought, reflected, and mused.
"Aku bersyukur atas hubunganku dengan dia, yang sungguh sungguh nyaman. Hubungan kita ini memang unik, menarik, dan sangat membebaskan. Tidak ada ekspektasi, tidak ada sakit hati.. Terima kasih :)" *, thus I told myself.
Therein comes the reply: "Mau dibuat lebih nyaman lagi?" **
"Ikut rencanaMu saja. Terjadilah kehendakMu :)" + I quipped.
Silence fell.. I am always ever thankful for being blessed with such a girl. No, she's not my girlfriend, and I don't know if she is ever going to be mine.. But I don't mind :) So I adjusted my sitting position and reclined slightly, and further contemplated my blessings. It has been an interesting journey, indeed. It has been mostly fun, and it has been a delightful one, filled with a lot of laughter, love, and pleasure. As my mind start to wonder on about my greater glories in the future, the beeper^ rang.
A really nice dinner, truly :)
Truly Indonesia's Finest,
*I'm so grateful for my relationship with her, which feels very comfortable. This relationship is really unique, interesting, and truly liberating. There are no expectations, there's no pain in the heart.. Thank you :)
**Would you like it to be made even more comfortable?
+I'll follow Thy plans. Thy will be done :)
^In Astons Express, you get a beeper when you order your food. It will ring when your food is ready, as a signpost to collect your meal.
Today is my last official day of school. Though there'll be more significant milestones, like the Farewell Assembly or the end of As, today marks the beginning of the finale throughout my four years sojourn in Singapore. Definitely not without challenges, my journey was. Now, I shall resist the temptation to speak like an old man and not write my year end reflections yet! There'll be one post constituting such overarching summation of my experiences here, but let's save that for later :)
Anyway, I decided to be an antisocial hermit who needed some time by himself, barring all contact and accessibility by deliberately leaving my mobile phone behind. It was a really fun outing, truly :) I opted for a steak dinner at Astons (but had a pork chop, as usual) and while waiting around twenty minutes for my order to be grilled to perfection, I thought, reflected, and mused.
"Aku bersyukur atas hubunganku dengan dia, yang sungguh sungguh nyaman. Hubungan kita ini memang unik, menarik, dan sangat membebaskan. Tidak ada ekspektasi, tidak ada sakit hati.. Terima kasih :)" *, thus I told myself.
Therein comes the reply: "Mau dibuat lebih nyaman lagi?" **
"Ikut rencanaMu saja. Terjadilah kehendakMu :)" + I quipped.
Silence fell.. I am always ever thankful for being blessed with such a girl. No, she's not my girlfriend, and I don't know if she is ever going to be mine.. But I don't mind :) So I adjusted my sitting position and reclined slightly, and further contemplated my blessings. It has been an interesting journey, indeed. It has been mostly fun, and it has been a delightful one, filled with a lot of laughter, love, and pleasure. As my mind start to wonder on about my greater glories in the future, the beeper^ rang.
A really nice dinner, truly :)
Truly Indonesia's Finest,
*I'm so grateful for my relationship with her, which feels very comfortable. This relationship is really unique, interesting, and truly liberating. There are no expectations, there's no pain in the heart.. Thank you :)
**Would you like it to be made even more comfortable?
+I'll follow Thy plans. Thy will be done :)
^In Astons Express, you get a beeper when you order your food. It will ring when your food is ready, as a signpost to collect your meal.
Friday, 17 August 2012
Day 31 - Day of Independence
(Hi, today's post will be kind of bilingual, but no worries, translations are provided!)
The world needs more faith. Faith is enough, more than enough, to solve any kinds of problems, always. Around eight months back, I received the lesson of the importance of faith from my guide. "Setelah menghadapi dua ratus tahun penjajahan, Indonesia bisa merdeka dengan memegang satu keyakinan. Satu keyakinan yang dirangkum dalam tiga kata, tetapi kekuatannya menyatukan dua ratus lima puluh juta manusia di nusantara. Keyakinan itu adalah 'Merdeka atau Mati.' Merdeka atau Mati."*
Today commemorates Indonesia's 67 years of Independence from the hands of the Netherlands. When I updated my Facebook status, I mentioned that Indonesia has been independent from our conquerors, but she is hardly sovereign over poverty and corruption. What does it take to develop a nation? The answer, is again, faith. The faith manifests itself as a strength, to never give up, to never yield, and always strive forward: realizing what has actually been there all along, and taking back what she rightfully owns. That is the Indonesian Spirit.
This faith, stronger than the unity of even the world's most intimate couples, are ingrained in every Indonesian's blood. It defies logic, how despite we are treated as second-class citizens, how we feel increasingly frustrated by the pollution and traffic congestion, how we feel threatened by internal security and the stability of the country, we still take pride in the fact that we are Indonesians. Is it the soil, the sovereign land, where we feel that we belong to? Is it the air we breathe, or is it the water we drink, that made hundreds of thousands of youths willing to shed their blood a few decades ago?
Again, above all, it is the faith. 'Merdeka atau Mati.' The phrase truly reflects our desire for freedom beyond freedom. Lack thereof is worse than death. Now I pray to the Sovereign, so that I shall study ever harder, so that I shall possess ever more power, so that someday I can grow and give back to the country I love the most, and the country I am the most indebted towards. Even though I couldn't be part of the warfare to liberate you from the hands of the Hollands, I would be very honored to liberate you from the hands of corruption and poverty someday. Happy birthday Indonesia. Shall love you always.
"Tidak ada hal apapun yang bisa kulakukan, tiada siapapun yang akan bisa lakukan, yang bisa mengubah fakta bahwa aku dilahirkan sebagai orang Indonesia, di tanah airku tercinta ini. Dari nafas pertama sampai ke liang kubur, akan selalu merah darahku, putih tulangku. Untukmu, Indonesia." **
Truly Indonesia's Finest.
*After facing two hundred years of colonization, Indonesia achieved her freedom by holding one faith. That one faith is coined in a merely three-word long phrase, but its strength united two hundred and fifty million across the Indonesian archipelago. The faith is, 'Independence or Death.' 'Freedom or Annihilation.'
**There is nothing I nor anyone can do to do to ever change the truth that I am born Indonesian, here in my beloved homeland. From the first breath to the moment I enter my casket, forever shall my blood be red, my bones, white. For thee, Indonesia.
The world needs more faith. Faith is enough, more than enough, to solve any kinds of problems, always. Around eight months back, I received the lesson of the importance of faith from my guide. "Setelah menghadapi dua ratus tahun penjajahan, Indonesia bisa merdeka dengan memegang satu keyakinan. Satu keyakinan yang dirangkum dalam tiga kata, tetapi kekuatannya menyatukan dua ratus lima puluh juta manusia di nusantara. Keyakinan itu adalah 'Merdeka atau Mati.' Merdeka atau Mati."*
Today commemorates Indonesia's 67 years of Independence from the hands of the Netherlands. When I updated my Facebook status, I mentioned that Indonesia has been independent from our conquerors, but she is hardly sovereign over poverty and corruption. What does it take to develop a nation? The answer, is again, faith. The faith manifests itself as a strength, to never give up, to never yield, and always strive forward: realizing what has actually been there all along, and taking back what she rightfully owns. That is the Indonesian Spirit.
This faith, stronger than the unity of even the world's most intimate couples, are ingrained in every Indonesian's blood. It defies logic, how despite we are treated as second-class citizens, how we feel increasingly frustrated by the pollution and traffic congestion, how we feel threatened by internal security and the stability of the country, we still take pride in the fact that we are Indonesians. Is it the soil, the sovereign land, where we feel that we belong to? Is it the air we breathe, or is it the water we drink, that made hundreds of thousands of youths willing to shed their blood a few decades ago?
Again, above all, it is the faith. 'Merdeka atau Mati.' The phrase truly reflects our desire for freedom beyond freedom. Lack thereof is worse than death. Now I pray to the Sovereign, so that I shall study ever harder, so that I shall possess ever more power, so that someday I can grow and give back to the country I love the most, and the country I am the most indebted towards. Even though I couldn't be part of the warfare to liberate you from the hands of the Hollands, I would be very honored to liberate you from the hands of corruption and poverty someday. Happy birthday Indonesia. Shall love you always.
"Tidak ada hal apapun yang bisa kulakukan, tiada siapapun yang akan bisa lakukan, yang bisa mengubah fakta bahwa aku dilahirkan sebagai orang Indonesia, di tanah airku tercinta ini. Dari nafas pertama sampai ke liang kubur, akan selalu merah darahku, putih tulangku. Untukmu, Indonesia." **
Truly Indonesia's Finest.
*After facing two hundred years of colonization, Indonesia achieved her freedom by holding one faith. That one faith is coined in a merely three-word long phrase, but its strength united two hundred and fifty million across the Indonesian archipelago. The faith is, 'Independence or Death.' 'Freedom or Annihilation.'
**There is nothing I nor anyone can do to do to ever change the truth that I am born Indonesian, here in my beloved homeland. From the first breath to the moment I enter my casket, forever shall my blood be red, my bones, white. For thee, Indonesia.
Friday, 10 August 2012
Day 25 - Sovereign
I opened my eyes.
A personal but prominent voice spoke, "Who are you to defy His sovereign Words? For without Him, without I, you are nothing."
"But you gave me so much freedom." I murmured, being yet fully aware of what's happening.
"More, much more than you realize." His tone softened, becoming somewhat soothing and calm. "I am by your side, but you seldom feel My presence. I watch you as you rise awake, and as you lie asleep.. I understand you more than anything in the world.. I have lived within you since the beginning of time, and unto the end of it.."
My face loosened. I closed back my eyes and whispered my reply, "Finally, I am able to hear You. Able to hear Him. Thank You... It is such a relief.."
He became slightly impatient, still amicably, akin to a good teacher prodding his student to grasp a difficult concept. "Then, tell me. how long do you plan to keep on treading waters? Are you ready for His plans through I?"
"Pray, tell me how to not tread waters."
"Surrender yourself to the sovereign, the almighty, and the omnipotent presence of His. Listen to Me, leave everything to Me. Everything else is lesser and tantamount to going in circles."
(...)
My worries dissolved and my fears conquered before such presence.
A personal but prominent voice spoke, "Who are you to defy His sovereign Words? For without Him, without I, you are nothing."
"But you gave me so much freedom." I murmured, being yet fully aware of what's happening.
"More, much more than you realize." His tone softened, becoming somewhat soothing and calm. "I am by your side, but you seldom feel My presence. I watch you as you rise awake, and as you lie asleep.. I understand you more than anything in the world.. I have lived within you since the beginning of time, and unto the end of it.."
My face loosened. I closed back my eyes and whispered my reply, "Finally, I am able to hear You. Able to hear Him. Thank You... It is such a relief.."
He became slightly impatient, still amicably, akin to a good teacher prodding his student to grasp a difficult concept. "Then, tell me. how long do you plan to keep on treading waters? Are you ready for His plans through I?"
"Pray, tell me how to not tread waters."
"Surrender yourself to the sovereign, the almighty, and the omnipotent presence of His. Listen to Me, leave everything to Me. Everything else is lesser and tantamount to going in circles."
(...)
My worries dissolved and my fears conquered before such presence.
Monday, 6 August 2012
Day 20 - Kindergarten
Hi there :)
Other than having to dance Macarena in front of my whole GP class, today was interesting for a lot of other reasons.
So I was lost in the bottom of abyss, left alone in the dark, questioning the misgivings of this world. A sudden inspiration came, the rope was thrown out. I pulled the rope, and became in contact with a particular girl. She is really different from the rest as she has a very developed soul-infused casing; someone who is extremely wise and nonjudgemental. Anyway, I have been meaning to see her and discuss a lot of issues with her, and it happened today :)
She was originally a secondary schoolmate in Indonesia, I had vague memories of talking to her. That's about it; I've barely spoken to her.. Nevertheless, we established some ground within the first few minutes of talking and the awkwardness vanished like magic. What we talked about, God knows, shall not disclose it here! Good to know that she gives me the necessary reassurance and calmness, infused with occasional excitement, just as a kindergarten child would be so excited to see his teacher.
Anyway, I am extremely extremely grateful for having the chance to see her. I am thankful that I am not alone in this journey; unlike her who has experienced the painfulness of knowing too much too early. It is really interesting to listen about her insights on life and relationships, and to understand how liberal she is. Lastly, she was talking about what appeals to her about men, which is their 'sexy energy'. And I couldn't help but think about GANGNAM STYLE! AHHAAHHAAHAH
Well, nice meeting you, and thank you for your guidance. See you sometime :)
Truly Indonesia's Finest,
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