To Care

When I started practicing Buddhism, I came across a wonderful and inspirational book by Ajahn Brahm, titled "Opening the Door of Your Heart". There are a lot of interesting stories that made its mark on me, and I sincerely recommend you readers to get the book, whether or not you are a practicing Buddhist. The book is a compilation of delightful stories about happiness and life, and if the author's name was hidden, one would not suspect that it was written by a monk!

Anyway, there is a story that struck me that I wanted to discuss today. Ajahn Brahm claims that the story was taken from Leo Tolstoy's, and in the story, there was a king who was seeking wisdom. After numerous years of study, the king realized that all the important stuff in life can be answered in three questions:

1. When is the most important time?
2. Who is the most important person?
3. What is the most important thing to do?

And eventually, as the story goes, the king was saved from assassination as he adhered to the principles he learned from the answers to the questions. Anyway, I am not here today to discuss the story, so I shall skip the answers for questions number 1 and 2. Readers, I challenge you to figure out the answer yourself.. Or I might just do a blog post on them in the future. Stay tuned :)

Anyway, I wanted to discuss question number 3, which answer is written as the title of the post. Yes, the most important thing to do is to care. In his book, Ajahn Brahm skipped the explanation of why 'to care' is the most important thing to do; Instead, he attempted to illustrate the importance of caring through other anecdotes. I personally didn't quite get the anecdotes, and I have been reflecting hard on why 'to care' precedes everything else.

Today, it finally dawned on me that 'to care' does indeed precede everything else. As part of my self-motivation and self-improvement, whenever I feel unhappy, I stop blaming or complaining. Instead, I pull myself out of the state of being reactive, and start to be proactive by asking myself "why am I unhappy?" and then "what do I want to do?" I am no longer a victim. I am a creator.

However, when I reflected further, I realize that I am at my happiest state when other people around me care about me, and also when I have people I care about. Whenever I feel that people care about me, I feel warm, I feel alive, I feel that life is worth living. As a student studying overseas in different schools and countries, it just dawned on me that my happiest moments are when I have finally established a group of friends whom I care about and who care about me back.

When I was in SJI, among other people, Christian truly cared about me. It was my two exes in Raffles, with Michael and a few other bunch. It was Ricky, Sheila, Kodor, and Christian again when I was in BLCU, and finally, it was Shanghui when I was in Amherst last year. (I know I skipped Princeton in Beijing, but then my roommate and a couple of other special ladies cared about me, so I was in good hands).

So now, at least I know what I want. I want to care more about other people, and I want people to care more about me. Caring about other people doesn't necessarily mean that you have to see them and hang out with them everyday. Giving space to your friends when they need space is caring too. Even being angry, or turning a cold shoulder, can be a form of caring too. As long as these actions are done with the betterment of the other person in mind. And no, being stressed and burnt out does not stem from overwork. Stress and burn-outs truthfully stem from the lack of connection and intimacy with the people around you, because there is no caring/being cared about exchange that is desperately needed by everyone.

I believe that if I care about other people, others will reciprocate, and now it is high time for me to manifest my beliefs.

Truly Indonesia's Finest,

My Sassy Girl OST Lyrics (John Kim, Princeton in Beijing Version) 我的野蛮女友歌词（普北班形式）

I Believe from Isue Shin on Vimeo.

When I was in Princeton in Beijing this summer, my friend John Kim teamed up with some of his buddies to do an amazing cover of My Sassy Girl's Original Sound Track. He translated the song lyrics from Korean to Chinese, so that is why the lyrics are different from the officially translated version of the song. Anyway, call me biased but I honestly find the lyrics much more beautiful than the official one. Enjoy!

我参加普北班的时候有一个朋友，John Kim。那时候，他刚刚跟他的女朋友分手了，但是她还坚持试试恢复他的关系。他想找一个活动，让他忙一些，所以他把《我的野蛮女友》的歌儿翻译下来，然后他跟两个朋友为所有的普北班学生们唱歌儿。虽然我可能有偏见，但是我个人认为，他翻译的歌词比真正的翻译漂亮多了。我希望，你们会享受这首歌儿！

I believe, 你还那里等待 (ni hai zai na li deng dai)

爱的路，总是充满了祝福 (ai de lu, zong shi chong man le zhu fu)

I believe，你还在把爱深埋 (ni hai zai ba ai shen mai)

我在这里，为你整夜在徘徊 (wo zai zhe li, wei ni zheng ye zai pai huai)

看不到未来 (kan bu dao wei lai)

却挡不住相爱 (que dang bu zhu xiang ai)

就算短暂分开 (jiu suan duan zan fen kai)

也不能，把这缘分结束 (ye bu neng, ba zhe yuan fen jie shu)

曾经走过漫漫长路 (ceng jing zou guo man man chang lu)

只要有爱，默默地祈祷 (zhi yao you ai, mo mo de qi dao)

真心的让彼此更幸福 (zhen xin de rang bi ci geng xing fu)

曾经走过漫漫长路 (ceng jing zou guo man man chang lu)

泪水模糊了我和你 (lei shui mo hu le wo he ni)

那一刻我们俩，依偎在一起 (na yi ke wo men lia, yin wei zai yi qi)

从此永远不再分离 (cong ci yong yuan bu zai fen li)

2x

我相信那份爱，这份感动 (wo xiang xin na fenr ai, zhe fenr gan dong)

只要你拥有着勇气 (zhi yao ni yong you zhe yong qi)

真心付出自己 (zhen xin fu chu zi ji)

一切，都为爱人牵挂 (yi qie, dou wei ai ren qian gua)

再长的等待也不怕 (zai chang de deng dai ye bu pa)

曾经走过漫漫长路 (ceng jing zou guo man man chang lu)

只要有爱，默默地祈祷 (zhi yao you ai, mo mo de qi dao)

真心的让彼此更幸福 (zhen xin de rang bi ci geng xing fu)

曾经走过漫漫长路 (ceng jing zou guo man man chang lu)

泪水模糊了我和你 (lei shui mo hu le wo he ni)

那一刻我们俩，依偎在一起 (na yi ke wo men lia, yin wei zai yi qi)

从此永远不再分离 (cong ci yong yuan bu zai fen li)

依偎在一起 (yin wei zai yi qi)

从此永远不再分离 (cong ci yong yuan bu zai fen li...)

Inspiration/Note to self

I just came up with these while I was running in the morning. A slight heads up: Part English and mostly Bahasa Indonesia.

Walaupun lebih baik sengasara sebentar kemudian bahagia selama-lamanya, daripada sebentar-bentar enak terus sengsara selama-lamanya, janganlah menunda kebahagiaan. Berbahagialah sekarang, belajarlah untuk menikmati pahitnya kopi kehidupan. Belajarlah untuk menari di tengah tetesan hujan. Practice happiness now!

Atur tujuan, maka jalanan akan muncul dengan sendirinya. Tetapi, nikmatilah perjalanan itu sekarang, sebab di masa kinilah kita hidup; Dan kehidupan ini merupakan kumpulan-kumpulan dari momen-moment tersebut.

Bukannya itu adalah intisari dalam menjadi seorang manusia? Senikmatnya kita kuatir dan pesimis, negative thinking tidak akan merubah apa-apa dalam hidup kita. Sebaliknya, percayalah. Fokuskan pikiranmu ke visualisasi, dan lakukanlah apapun yang bisa kamu lakukan, sebaik mungkin, setiap harinya.

Confidence comes from blamelessness. From integrity, from being impeccable. From being united and integrated with your higher stream of consciousness.

Truly Indonesia's Finest,

Near Misses.

"It was raining, and I was running.."

I remember someone telling me that my life is full of near misses. Now, I would affirm to the statement, but I would define 'near misses' as the opposite.

"I stared at my GPS. Sandwiched between my heavy breathing and soft curses, the stubborn GPS finally loaded.."

I went to Boston today. For us Amherst students, going to Boston is a luxury, both of time and money. However, one of my best friends from Princeton in Beijing, Shosuke, planned to go to Boston that day to celebrate his birthday. Moreover, they had an Indonesian festival that day, where they showcase Indonesian culture and sell heavenly food. Naturally, I came down to Boston.

"If I had slipped even once, if the metro was late by one more minute, I.."

I arrived to South Station at 10am and bought some coffee and did some reading on Freud as I waited for Sacho (lit. Company president; Shosuke's nickname) as his train would only reach Boston at 1130. Sacho has this mysterious aspect in him which makes him very likeable and popular among his friends. After thinking thoroughly about it, I finally understood why. Sacho is always smiling, and he takes things easy. He is always so funny, so relaxed and out going. He can be serious if needed, but he never allows himself to be involved in dramas. I am grateful to know such a person in my life. And you bet, he is an overachiever too: He went to Todai (Tokyo University) before transferring to Pomona and subsequently Brown.

"I looked up, and at the intersection I saw the plaque that said Atlantic Avenue. It continued to drizzle.."

We went straight to the Yamato, the sushi buffet place recommended by Sacho's friend Tomo, whom we also met there. (I know right, Tomo.) He's a cool kid from Tokyo who decided to study in MiT because he wanted to meet scientists from all over the world. He takes seven classes this semester and last semester, and he's not even stressed or swamped with work. Mind you, these are lab science classes like inorganic chemistry or advanced mathematics classes above linear algebra. Food was amazing, it was around 20 bucks per person; Tamago, unagi, tori chaahan, tobiko, and amaebi were among my favorites. Tomo took us to H-mart (where I witnessed Paris Baguette!! Talk about being Beijing-sick) and to his frat. Cool guy, cool guy.

"I finally saw the entrance to the South Station. I had less than three minutes left, so I just sprung the doors open and ran up the flight of stairs.."

So we said goodbye to Tomo and took the metro to Malden to meet another Sacho's friend for the chuanr dinner. This guy is a Japan-born-Chinese; So we all spoke mandarin for the most part. Anyway, Malden is actually about half an hour by metro from the central Boston, and we actually made his friend wait for twenty minutes (不好意思)。Nonetheless, we finally reached the 串儿 (bbq meat) place which is about a fifteen minute walk from the metro station. It was glorious food, considering the physical and cultural chasm between Boston and Beijing. I really enjoyed the 烤馒头 (mantou, is fried with an egg yolk) and the 麻辣香锅(a spicy but dry hotpot). In the midst of the food and the conversation, I decided to check my Peterpan Bus ticket on a whim. Thank goodness I did that, because I realized that my bus was leaving at 8pm, not 830. It was around 7:19pm in the 串儿 place, common sense tells one to forget it because it would take 15 minutes to walk to the station and 25 minutes to take the metro down to South Station. Remember to add in the extra 10 minutes to get to the Peterpan bus station and the fact that it was raining.

"I frantically looked for the gate that leaves for Springfield. On platform 7, I saw a giant, green rectangular object outside the glasses, could it be.."

I gave my friends 25 bucks (I was told that the dinner amounted to 20 in the end, so it's all good) and decided to make a run. The 羊肉串儿 was very delicious by the way, the cumin flavor really came through, if only I could savour it when I was not running. I reasurred myself that I would make it to Boston South on time, because otherwise I either pay a private shuttle or a taxi for 200 grand or book a hotel for the night for about a similar price. When I wasn't running with all my might, I was visualizing with all my might, picturing myself sitting in a Peterpan bus.

...

"I sprinted to the door at platform 7 and sprung the door open. I almost wanted to cry, because the bus captain was still checking the tickets of the last few passangers. My wristwatch showed 8:02pm."

I made it. The bus was really full, and I sat on the second to last seat. It was rarely the case, but the bus was thankfully slightly tardy because there had been so many passangers. If a few people decided to cancel their trip, the bus would've left at 8 on the dot, and it would've been over for me. And yes, I don't regret booking the peterpan bus a week prior, because otherwise I wouldn't have been able to book last-minute, like what the circumstances within my friend circle in Amherst dictated.

Now I am seating in the bus, recounting my day and being so grateful that I am such a lucky person: I didn't miss my morning bus (which I nearly did, again due to my friend circle), I finished the Freud reading, I was allowed to join the sushi buffet, ate wonderful 串儿，and treated my japanese friends to Martabak (Indonesian sweet pancake), Indomie goreng, and Marquissa juice (idk how to spell this sorry) during the Indonesian cultural festival. I also made two awesome new Japanese friends, caught up with an amazing old friend, took pictures, had wonderful conversations, laughed a lot, joked and fooled around, spoke in bahasa for a bit, and caught the last bus back to Amherst. Despite running in the rain, at least I made it, and at least I didn't run in the rain because of a girl, like what happened in Beijing ;)

I had a good day. Thank you.

Truly Indonesia's finest.