Closure

(by the way, in case you have never realized, this post is a continuation of my Day 38's post - Last Night Out).

This post is dedicated to my little miss sunshine, to the heroine of my Singapore drama, to the 'half' in the one and a half relationships I've ever had.

I don't know if you will ever read this post, but yes, if you ever do, kindly be assured that it's you.

and I am sorry and thankful for everything.

We were talking about having a proper closure and all in Starbucks this morning, and although we've settled on a conclusion, I felt that my talk was cheap, so I'll write my own version of our closure. Sorry for always lurking in the penumbra. I can't imagine how much sadness I caused you, and up until the end of this morning, I have been harboring conflicted feelings.

As a person, my willpower was not of a steel. Seven months ago when I left, I hardened my heart and told myself to move on, for the best of us. For a while I thought I did; but the day we met again, our smiles turned to laughter, which turned to touches. Before long, I found my way back into your warm loving arms, and I had a battle with myself. Why do I have to leave?

However, we have to admit that ultimately both of us were not ready to be in contact with the waters, and thus, for the greater good of us, we have to move on. So you did, with greater and greater acceptance, and me too. But I know too well that there is a part of myself, and a part of yours, that didn't wish for this... It's fine, time will dissolve these feelings; meanwhile allow me to pray for your health, studies, and that your deserved 白马王子 will come timely. I am so glad that you have really grown, and thank you for the acceptance. Trust me, whatever motives you someday might think I had, I care for you, and that is it. Thenceforth comes the closure, the complete circle, and thank you for everything. I hope you enjoyed our time together as much as I did. And hopefully, it will be something we can look back and cherish as best friends in the future.

You are the first to call me panda. You transformed my ':p' to ':b'. You made Interact sessions much more colorful. You taught me empathy, you taught me what it means to work hard and never give up, you taught me to care. Thank you. You allowed me to enjoy witnessing a girl maturing, and I am definitely proud of you. You are a best friend whom I can relax and be really at ease. You make me laugh. You said that 'It is better to be bullied than to be ignored', and thus I bullied you. HAHAHA

Thank you so much for accompanying me during the whimsical bus rides, for sharing hugs during rainy days, for the days when we strolled Botanical Gardens with a cup of Island Creamery's ice cream on our hands. In you, I see an amazing friend, a sister, a role model, a teacher, and someone I admired. I will miss dearly your distinct fragrance, your barrage of infinite questions, and your forgetful auntie demeanor. HAHAHA

So, all the best for your prelims, A Levels, and everything else! I pray that your 白马王子 will come and snatch your heart away real soon, and for your health and amazing family as well. Help me thank your parents as well, they're awesome ;)

See you again someday! We will. Kindly take care until then:)

Yours Truly,