Reservoir

Once upon a time,

I took my car keys and went for a drive.

Although I miss Singapore sometimes, I still remember a lot of the stress I had to put up with to do well in my exams and excel in school. Of course, there were plenty of coping mechanisms, one of which I forgot until today. Whenever my dams were about to burst, I would go out and take a bus to McRitchie Reservoir. There, I would walk along the dark bodies of water and enjoy the smell of the forest while gazing at the stars. I would always go there by myself, alone, at night.

I would allow the nature to embrace me, enjoying my quiet moment of solitude. As I walk in further and further into the reservoir, the lights become dimmer and the sounds of cars become softer. In the depths of silence, there were no worries, there were no fears. Everything is going to be okay; I don't need to fear rejection or failure. There was a glob of wisdom-energy in the air that accessed me and revitalized my spirit. If there is a refresh button in life, this felt like hitting it. I would come back to my dorm, feeling more confident and stronger, ready to take on another stretch of challenge.

Two years, 20,000 miles, and a random drive later, I arrived at the Quabbin Reservoir at Amherst College. As I walked along quietly, staring at the great lakes and watching crimson, orange, and yellow leaves flutter about, I recognized the semblance that I'd encountered and forgotten so many times two years ago. The cool air and the softly blowing wind were casting the same spell on me. It may be forgotten, but it will never be lost on me.

I know, but I sometimes don't remember. But if I forget, I will remember to remind myself that I know.